Abby · autism · confessions · crafts · Down syndrome

I’m jealous of you.

I see your posts. You talk about how hard it is to potty train your daughter that is younger than mine. Potty training isn’t even on our radar right now, to be truthful. That’s not going to happen for at least another year or so…if we’re lucky.

I’m jealous of you. 

I see your statuses. How tired you are from running from one sport to the next, then on to birthday parties.  My son can’t play team sports, he gets too overstimulated. He doesn’t get invited to birthday parties.

I’m jealous of you.

I see you at the store, you get away with people not looking twice at your kids- you don’t see that look of recognition- and sometimes of pain- as they notice your child’s extra chromosome. I see you in the malls, walking with your kids, not worried about what next sound is going to set them running in the opposite direction. I see you at my other son’s basketball games. Walking in from the parking lot to cheer for your child, as I sit with my son who is hiding in the back of my car.  His autism fills the space between.

I’m so jealous of you.

You capture every milestone as they come naturally for your child. First steps. First words. I capture those, too. But they are after hours and hours of therapy, sleepless nights and drained bank accounts.  You talk about goals kicked and awards won, I speak of services gained and lawsuits averted. You fought for your child’s place on team. I fight for my child’s place in the classroom.

I hate myself for being jealous of normal.

It’s not your fault you don’t have kids with special needs anymore than it’s my fault that I do. With my oldest, I loved meeting those milestones, even bragged about them a little. I didn’t get it. I had no frame of reference. I didn’t realize how great it was that he developed the right muscles in the right way to sit, crawl then walk. I didn’t get with my other typical developing child how great it was that speech set in without us having to painstakingly draw out language, bit by bit, sign by sign and sound by sound.

And I’m sure I don’t realize how lucky I am to have an autistic son who can talk, and a daughter with Down syndrome that is even as healthy as she is.

Jealousy is a worthless emotion. Even if it pushes you to do more or be more, you’re not doing it for the right reasons. I fight this jealousy.  And, on days like today, I lose.

I’m jealous of you.

Abby · autism · confessions · crafts · Down syndrome

Rage, rage.

My husband took all the kids to Carter’s basketball practice and to get some food so I could have some time alone. I thought I’d clean, yet, I find myself typing into a computer that has come to know me so well.

The things this laptop could say. The confessions I’ve made to people I’ve never met. The sadness that I hold and let out in tiny bits as to not overwhelm, but just enough to keep whatever grasp on sanity I have left.

Life is hard. I do not have the market cornered on sorrow, as I am reminded of often. Being a part of the Down syndrome community is amazing, but it also lends itself to the grim reminders of the fragility of our children, the fear that lurks around every cold, every fever, every sleepless night. Another life lost too soon, and there’s no way to exist in this community without that reminder.

“Death is at your doorstep. It will steal your innocence. It will not steal your substance”- Mumford and Sons

My substance. What am I made of, anyways? Life has found a way to test my resolve, to strengthen my spine, to bruise my knees. And now, as I teeter on the threshold of the great depressive abyss I find myself falling into all too often, I hear the words of too many echo in my brain:

“With everything you have going on in your life, it’s okay to be depressed once in a while.”

No. I will not. Too many times I feel myself being dragged down and I loosen my grip on the ground that I grasp as my only ally. I give in before I fight. Too many times I give every bit of fight I have to battles that are not my own. This time, I will fight.

I will not lay down and, in the words of Dylan Thomas, “go gently into that good night.” Sure, that poem wasn’t about depression, but I feel like it applies. I feel like depression robs me of the light I have in my life.

Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

So now I rage. I fight. I will do whatever it takes to be FINE. I have too much to give to be robbed of my substance. I have too much to say to be robbed of my words.

and, quite frankly, I have too much to do to be sad.

autism · confessions · crafts · Down syndrome

Mantle Garland

I love the look and smell of REAL garlands at Christmas time. The problem is, the ones you can buy live or fake aren’t bushy enough for me (unless you’re willing to drop some serious coin on them. Did that sound gangsta? I was hoping it sounded gangsta), and making one out of all live plants is time consuming. I don’t like projects that take more than fifteen minutes and crap I have on hand, so I never do them.

just fake garland

This year was freaking GENIUS though, if I don’t say so myself. I bought your basic $10 fake lighted garland from Home Depot. Looked good enough on it’s own, but I wanted it to be bushy and alive and Pottery Barn like.

So I went out with my scissors (because having any sort of gardening implements is just beyond me, and I’m no longer allowed near chainsaws) and cut off branches from my boxwood bushes in my front yard. Yeah. Right there. Just waiting to be crafted with. And you don’t have to have boxwoods (and I had to look up what kind of bush it was…I had no idea) in your yard, anything that is still green now will probably work. Go look at Pottery Barn. Their pricey mantle decor is all fresh stuff. Just copy them. It’s all I do. 

Then I came in, took the branches and JABBED them into the garland. If they didn’t want to stay, I’d take one of the little fake branches from the garland (that are wired) and wrap it around. I did this with the garland already on my mantle, so I could work from the middle out, but I don’t even think that matters.

It wasn’t bright enough for me (it never is) so I took another strand of white lights that was half burned out  and laid it on top of the garland and then kind of worked it around the branches.

From there, Peyton and I added ornaments. We got a really pretty cheap set from Walmart that had some that were glittered and some that were brown. Sparkly and rustic all at once.

I found when adding ornaments, and someone with real crafting experience feel free to correct me if I’m wrong (and if you are brave), bundling them in groups of two or three just looks better. I also didn’t hang them from the branches, I wired them in deep so they looked more apart of the garland. I used the little silver hooks you use on any ornaments to wire them in.

Anyways, super easy. Took me about 30 minutes total, including cutting the branches (which I really didn’t even have to do, they broke off pretty easily and breaking them off was just a little cathartic).

For the life of me I can’t get the stockings to hang the right way. Maybe that will be a post for another day. Probably not though.

I upload pictures of all of these projects as I do them to my instagram account. In fact, most of the crap on this blog is in condensed form on Instagram. Feel free to follow me there. I’m @mostlytruestuff

autism · confessions · crafts · Down syndrome

Oh Christmas ADHD

Lance: I’m not sure you can put 2,000 lights on that tree…blah blah blah…wattage..blah blah blah engineer…blah blah blah…amps….
Me: Is that a challenge?!
Lance: why do you do that? Turn everything into a challenge?
Me: Are you threatening me?
Lance: hmph.

Yeah suckas! 2,000 lights and one tree that will probably burn this place down in a week because I’ve forgotten to water it.

So then I went outside to admire my work from the front yard and noticed that a bush I had covered with white lights was competing with my tree in the window. So I yanked out all of the lights. At 10 o’clock at night.  I still felt like that damn bush was competing, so I went into the garage to find some garden sheers or a chainsaw

 (true story, the place we were renting back in Virginia had a chainsaw that I rendered useless by sawing through the extension chord. I tried to tell Lance that it was a design flaw and not user error, because why in the world would you want to be attached to a chord if you’re chainsawing something? I’m telling you, it’s WAY less scary to chase someone with a CORDED chainsaw than a gas powered. It doesn’t matter as much with an edger, mostly because it’s just ALL unexpected when someone comes running at you with an edger. Chainsaws are really quite cliche)

 There wasn’t anything to cut the bush down with, but I got distracted super quick when I couldn’t reach something on a shelf. If only I was TWO inches taller. Then I started thinking about who is two inches taller than me. Then I thought about the people who are shorter (and thus, less scary). My brother is two inches taller, I thought, so I sent him a text asking him how tall he was.  This of course led me to send him a picture of a doll attacking Peyton in his sleep.

I’m getting new ADHD meds today. Life is going to get less amazing.

But probably more clean.

At least I hope. I have yet to do anything with all of the boxes the lights came in. In fact, I came into the kitchen to clean it and the boxes, and here we are.

Anyways, if you pass by my house and see a tree that looks like it’s on fire, it’s not. Unless it is. In which case, call 911. Thanks.

Abby · autism · confessions · crafts · Down syndrome

It’s Not Your Fault.

I’ve written about the absurdity of the so called “studies” that are finding the cause of autism in everything. They’re correlational studies (in one of my psychology courses, my professor made us all chant “Correlation Does Not Equal Causation!” over and over and over again). They don’t prove anything. I could go on and on at length as to why each of these studies are flawed or why they don’t really say anything more than we already know…but it really isn’t the message I want to share. And it’s boring. If you get nothing more out of my blog than this one stupid sentence, then I’ve done my job:

This is not your fault.

Casey’s autism is no more my fault than Abby’s Down syndrome. Researchers, the good ones, are continually finding evidence that autism is genetic. GENETIC GENETIC GENETIC. And even if it’s not, even if one day they decide that your child’s autism was caused by you drinking Mountain Dew during your first three trimesters of pregnancy (I did that on purpose), or whatever it is that your great aunt keeps posting to your facebook wall…guess what?

This is not your fault.

We as humans want answers. It makes us TERRIBLY uncomfortable to not know why things happen. It’s why so many people join the Anti-Vax Religion. Because even in the face of OVERWHELMING research, ANY answer is better than NO answer.  Because maybe knowing what caused it means that you have any damn control over it.

I know this because I’ve lived it. I was there once, too. I wanted it to be vaccines that caused his regression because that would mean that no longer vaccinating would prevent future regressions. When that didn’t pan out (again, research…) I kept looking along with the researchers to find whatever it was that I did to make Casey this way. Was it going to the dentist before I knew I was pregnant? How about the metal fillings in my mouth? Was it the Mountain Dew? I wanted answers.  I wanted control. With every step I took in that direction, I got another step away from the place I wanted so desperately to be: acceptance.

It comes down to this: If you had known that any of your actions would cause your child’s autism would you have willingly done it (please don’t make this into one of those “I love my child just the way they are pissing matches…this is not what I’m asking here…)? No?

This is not your fault.

When you can get past this, you can move on to bigger and better things. Acceptance is amazing. It doesn’t mean you’re okay with it all of the time, but it means that you understand that this is the way life was meant to be. And that it can be a really great life. Autism included. 

crafts · pinterest

Pinterest Pins that aren’t Pinteresting.

I’m nothing if not super helpful. So here’s me helping you manage some of the Pinterest pins out there that aren’t what you think they are.  Pretty much everything on Pinterest sucks besides my “funny” board. You should follow it. It’s fantastic and the best thing I’ve ever done. Ever.

First:

I can’t give this one any photo or blog credit because it says the blog has been removed. It probably went inactive because the chick that wrote this tutorial died while making pomander balls.

These. Take. Forever.

They’re super cute and super easy and super sucky. They take like fourteen years to make if you want them to look right. And don’t just try to do it with bigger flowers, because that doesn’t look right, either. I wish I had taken a picture of my half done pomander ball. Because after fourteen hours and twelve thousand needle pokes to my fingers, I gave the hell up.

Next:

http://www.thenshemade.com/2010/08/souper-storage-idea.html

This one is great in concept, but doesn’t work too well if you have soup cans that aren’t Campell’s or don’t have full boxes ALL of the time. The problem is, the box isn’t sturdy enough to stack them unless all of the bottom boxes are COMPLETELY full.  If not, they crumple on each other. You could reinforce them, I guess, but with all that damn work, you might as well just go out and buy one of these:

These suckers are $30 at Overstock.com. I was not paid for this endorsement. I’m just trying to save you some time and sanity.

This one is my favorite because it gets repinned LIKE CRAZY.  DIY water beads from things you can find in your kitchen! What you’re pinning folks? The page to a HOAX. I laugh every time I see it. I’m going to laugh harder when I pin it from this page and people repin it. You should repin it, too. Because we’re hilarious. And if you’re here from a pin on Pinterest, hello and welcome.

Sorry you’re not going to be making cool water beads.

This is a lot like the Mountain Dew hoax I warned you about a while back. Don’t waste good Dew. I implore you.

But you know what I do love with all of my heart and can’t wait until Halloween to make? This bad boy:

http://www.creatingreallyawesomefreethings.com/20-unique-pumpkin-ideas/

In fact, I might just make one out of a watermelon and put it on Erin’s porch while I wait until pumpkins are in season.

Meanwhile, follow me on Pinterest. It’s worth it. I swear. Even more than following this damn blog, which if you aren’t, you should. It’s the right thing to do.

Photobucket

crafts

Our Family Creed

Lance and I have spoken a lot about how we want to have a Family Creed to hang in our house. Something that was completely “us”. That summed up all of what our family is about, what we stand for, and what we want to become. I made it the other night.

(Inspiration came from watching “Kid History” on youtube. There’s actually a framed picture of the same kind of thing in the background of their home. I imagine it’s also their family creed.  But if anyone asks you, this was totally my idea)

Are you ready?

Perfection. Sorry the picture sucks. It’s because my camera is THE WORST. I bought a new one last year hoping that mine was broken (it wasn’t). I thought I was taking a step up in the world because it was bigger. It’s just as sucky as the previous one.

SO my husband said that if my blog ever hits 250 followers, he’d let me get one. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t think that will ever happen (or that I’ll get bored before then, he’s probably got me there). Help me to do what keeps every wife awake at night? Help me to prove my husband wrong. If you haven’t yet, click “follow.” This is as shameless as it gets. But I really want a new damn camera. OR if you don’t want to, just buy me a new one. I would very much like a Canon Rebel. Yes, just like E’s. Yes, because I want to be just like her. I’m trying in everrry wayyy.

crafts · repurpose

latest free(ish) project: Dresser to shoe rack using its own parts

 Hi all. For those of you that are new, this may seem like a departure from what you thought this blog was about. This is a blog about a family with a child or two with special needs. It’s about those special needs, about our family, and about how I cope with the life I have {love}. 
Growing up, my mom always had “projects.” These projects made me CRAZY. I didn’t get why she always had to be doing something, creating something, etc. We always had to help.  I hated helping. In the process of helping though, I learned that I could fix things myself. I learned how to use tools. I learned how to take trash and turn it into treasure {maybe not so much treasure as less-of-trash}. My father passed away when I was 13, leaving my mom a single parent to six kids. She had a lot on her plate, why did she always take up so much more?
Now I get it. The projects my mom used to do that made me crazy are the same projects now that keep me SANE {mostly}.  I love crafts, I don’t have a ton of money, so when I can take something for free and turn it into something I love, it gives me a great deal of satisfaction {when you hear “satisfaction” do you automatically say it saaaattt-is-faaactttt-tionnn. I can’t get no! No no no!}. 
So here’s my latest free {ish} project. I’d love to hear or see what you do that keeps you sane…please let me know in the comments!

 Before
After

This was SHOCKINGLY easy. I don’t have very many tools out here. We didn’t bring anything pneumatic (no nail gun, which is just the most fun thing to use in the world), and I don’t have my sanders or my miter saw. So when I picked this badboy up off the side of the road, I knew I had to be inventive.

Yes. Another thing off the side of the road. That’s the best part about this place. People just leave stuff out and post it on Craigslist. This was two blocks from my house. I LOVED the curvy lines on it. When we picked it up, I noticed that it was in BAD shape. I wish I had gotten better pictures. It’s a wood piece that had been fully covered with a badly damaged veneer. I tried scraping the veneer off, but it wasn’t working. The two bottom drawer fronts were a total loss. The top of the dresser was hammered to death, too.

So, borrowing an idea I saw on pinterest, I made it into a shoe rack. Here’s how: 

First, I took my crowbar (the best non-power tool) and pried off the top. I flipped it over and used the bottom as the top. I had to fill in the holes from the screws, but it was in a lot better shape than the top. I sanded the crap out of it.

Next, I took apart the drawers. Knowing I didn’t have any of my saws (a jigsaw would have been dreamy to cut the front part of the shelves), so I re-used the entire drawers besides the fronts to make the shelves.

Most dressers don’t have anything between the drawers. Makes it easier to shove too many clothes in them.  For the top shelf, I glued the base in first. You’ll have to center it right in the middle because it’s not as wide as the drawer used to be. There should only be a couple of centimeters in between.  I just used liquid nails, you can use really any sort of wood glue. Then I clamped it down in four spots. While that was drying, I took the back sides of the old drawer and put them together. Since this is going to sit on top of what used to be the bottom of the drawer, there wasn’t enough space for all of it as it was. If you’re doing this, measure using your disassembled drawer first.


So I took the little indent where the bottom of the drawer used to fit into and hammered it off. You can use your crowbar, if necessary. Don’t worry if you split your wood. You’re going to be nailing the sides of the drawer into the side of the dresser anyways.


Where the sides of the drawer met the front there were dovetail joints. So when I yanked the front off, I had little pieces of wood sticking out, like a puzzle. Again, I took my crowbar, jammed the sharp end into the divit above the joint and hammered down on it until it came out. If your dresser doesn’t have these joints, awesome. If you’re stuck in this area with a different type of drawer, send me a picture and I’ll figure something out. Or make my husband.

So after the joint parts were eliminated, I pushed the drawer back as far as it would go before it fell off the back of the bottom of the drawer. I nailed the front to each side of the dresser. In the back, I glued the bottom of the drawer to the wood above. It doesn’t fit well, but it doesn’t matter, no one looks back there anyways.

For the bottom I tried re-nailing the bottom of the drawer to the sides. This kind of sucked. You could do it, but it doesn’t really matter.  So do the above steps again, clamp down the bottom and hang tight until the glue dries.

After the drawers were permanantly adhered to the dresser, I took some spackle and filled in the areas with big dents, holes, etc. I filled the sides where the joints were until they were straight. This took a couple of coats.  Then I sanded the entire thing down again. You can see everything I filled- it’s in white.

Then I spray painted it. In my house. That was a poor choice. They really do mean “well ventilated” area. I inhaled some of it (some of you would use the term “huffing”) on accident and it turned all the hairs inside my nose white. Which made me realize how completely gross the inside of my nose is. I’m a hairy girl. Everywhere.

Then I distressed the crap out of it to make it look like it was intentionally weathered and beaten up. After that, I used a faux glaze that I had tinted brown (with my craft paint. Don’t listen to the jerks at Home Depot, craft paint worked great). I used maybe 1 tablespoon of paint. Just keep adding until it’s a light brown. Using a spounge brush, I glazed it twice. The glaze set into the scratches and distressing and made them stand out just a bit more. It also made the dresser feel hard and smooth all over. Just like me.

(Just kidding. I am neither of those things. )

Then I bought some $1 drawer pulls from Home Depot , stuck them on, dragged it out to the front and voila! Scratches on the wood where I dragged it. another poor choice. I’ll post how to fill those in the future. I made Lance re-screw the top on, mostly because I was winning a game of spades and didn’t want to do it. Done. I finished something. Pat on backs all around.

crafts

fifteen minute art project for the unartsy.



I like to craft. I do. But I’m not an “artist”. You’ve seen my drawings. That’s my best work. I promise. I’m pretty good at copying ideas, though. I’m working on a craft blog that does such a thing. It’s called Mostly Copied Crafts. It’s almost ready. I just need to get a little sick again so I have reason to sit on the computer for several hours. So while you’re so patiently waiting (which you are, right? no? that’s okay. I’m not terribly hurt. I really just need to have something to show for all the time I spend on Pinterest and craft sites) for that blog, check out my latest craft.

But I should back up. Do you remember the story about right before we called 911 after Abby’s hands and feet turned blue (or are you only here for the pictures…of me…because I’m so hot…if you’re into frumpy) . Remember how when I was walking back to the house the cotton was blowing in the air and I felt a crazy amount of peace out of nowhere? So I’ve really wanted a picture of the cotton blowing in the wind. But I haven’t found any that I liked or that I was rich enough for.  I’m cheap. So I made one. Mostly to see if I could. But I like how it turned out. Anyways…

 Made some vinyl with the vinyl cutter.  I can make you some, too. Just let me know. And paypal me $3 with your address. See? We’re good friends.  OR you could just get some big stickers out of your stash of scrapbooking stuff you’ll never ever use. I promise.

I just slapped it on the edge of the canvas. Easy. Peasy?( No. I’ve been around Heather entirely too much lately. I feel an itching need to wear cardigans, I use terms like “easy peasy” and I get excited when I think about serving nachos. I’m a thick rimmed pair of glasses away from this being really weird. )

 After the letters were on I took two shades of blue. I did the darker first and then went over it with the lighter color right after. I took a spray bottle and sprayed it over and over again until it got streaky- and in some places the paint pulled up a little  (it’s hard to show in a picture…but I liked the effect…affect? Someone help me with the usage of that word).

 See? spray spray spray.  Then I painted on just a little more of the light blue mixed with a little water.

And then I laid down and watched the birds fly in and out of my trees while at the same time entertaining Abby by letting her face rake me. And, no lie, I took this picture. OF NATURE.

The painting thing. It’s supposed to look a little surreal or whatever the term is. Then I waited until it was almost dry and peeled up the letters.

Do you need a picture of that? Really? Lame sauce.

Then I took a cotton ball, put a tiny TINY bit of paint on it, blotted it out until it was almost dry and stamped it in the places where I wanted the cotton puffs to be. I thought I was being ironic. But I don’t really know what that word means either. What’s happening to me?  Words are useless. (You know what it is? It’s the damn prozac. It makes me a doormat who can’t remember words and takes pictures of NATURE. But I need it, my family needs it, until we can get to DC and I can get to a REAL psychiatrist who will, almost definitely, institutionalize me. How much of this rant was true? You should start a pool. Is that the word for when you all put in money and whoever is closest wins it? Did you know that the stuff at the cabin that stings your legs is called stinging nettle and not stinging metal? I always thought it was named weirdly. But nettle is also weird I guess.)   


Then I painted some brown on the cotton. Just a little bit. Then I put it in my room where I can see it from my toilet. Because I don’t ever close the door when I pee. Stems from years of things being ruined beyond repair when I did such a crazy thing like that. You know what I’ve noticed though? That when I do go to the bathroom, the first thing I do is rest my elbows on my legs and cradle my head in my hands like I’m losing my freaking mind. EVERY TIME! When did this freaky habit start? 

So now as motivation to look up, I have a picture that I constantly critique. Awesome. 

crafts

Latest Easy Projects

Okay. I blog stalk all over some awesome craft blogs. I found these two last week and did them ALL BY MYSELF! No husband needed (okay, I had to have him show me how to use the nail gun again, but that’s because I forget everything I’m taught).

Here’s the tutorial:
http://www.brownpaper–packages.com/2011/04/place-for-everythingwith-under-table.html

Before: (gross, right?)

Stupid Blogger won’t let me move the pictures around where I want them. Anyways, I did things a little differently. I took my silverware outside to make sure I’d have the compartments where I wanted them. Once I had an idea of where they’d be I cut the wood to size. If you have the standard cabinets that every house came with in Port Orchard 10 years ago, the width for all of your cuts will be just before the 13″ mark. Just stick your blade down so that the left side of it is right along the 13″ line and you’ll be good. I glued mine with your basic wood glue and it hasn’t been great. I’m going to do the next ones with Gorilla white glue. You can’t really tell in the pictures, but the bottoms of my drawers were disgusting. So I bought some drawer liners, LAME sauce. All it is is cheap crappy vinyl that ended up being more expensive than the stuff I have here.  After I cut and glued the pieces, I stuck a bunch of blocks around them to hold them into place.
 

So they turned out nice, yes? I like having big spaces for the silverware to go. Easier to chuck it in violently. I hate emptying the dishwasher.

Next: Library shelf. This one I was really proud of. Easy, but made me feel all sorts of special when I was done. The tutorial I used is here: 
I painted mine first because my husband told me to. Dumb. Wait to paint them after. Saves a lot of time and effort. I have little of each. Mostly because I make poor life choices.


 
This isn’t the way I’m keeping the shelf (because it looks like it says “mo”) but I wanted to give you an idea of what it could look like. I’m thinking about putting the framed picture I have of Phil K. holding a severed head up there. Easy. Cheap. (uh huh, that’s right)
crafts

Conference Crafts

I love General Conference . So much. There’s something so soothing about the voices of the speakers. I go right to sleep. They could start every single talk out with , “Dear Lexi P. Magnusson” and I’d still fall asleep. (on a side note, I really do think they should have just started several talks out that way…they were JUST for me…yeah, I’m that self centered). So anyways, I need something for my hands to do. So I craft. I build stuff. Saturday’s adventures are not yet completed, but I’ll show you what I did during the sessions on Sunday:

I made this with my Silhouette (I’m sucking up to them because I want to design things to cut for their store) and Bazzill Basics Paper. The middles are done with brads by Reminiscence- you can get them at Michaels. I simply cut the flowers, inked the edges, layered them, stuck the brad through and then hot glued them to a foam ball. In the spaces between the flowers on the ball, I glued scraps of paper. If I was thinking ahead, I probably would have just painted the ball the same color as the flowers, but I don’t think ahead. Not ever.  I got the container thingee from the dollar store. I put some foam circles in there (also from the dollar store). I wrapped a dowel in floral tape (dollar store) and stuck it in the bottom of the ball. Hot glued it so it stayed in place. I jabbed the dowel into the foam circles, and then hot glued. Which was a mistake. Those floral foam circle things aren’t meant to be hot glued. It’s a gross mess. So I shoved a roll of tulle in there and all around to hold it up. Voila.

Another fun secret? I didn’t put any flowers on the back of it. You don’t see it, so I’m not going to bother.

I had already made this “A” for Abby’s room (before my husband pointed out to me that maybe scarlet wasn’t the best color choice for this letter) using a big cardboard A from Joann’s. I made the texture by crumpling up tissue paper then Mod Podging it on to the letter. After it dried, I painted it all. I added another layer of mod podge to seal it in. I had originally put a big ugly daisy on it. Then I hid it because I didn’t like it. This time I cut the same flower shape out as the topiary , inked the edges and glued it on. Much better.

I’m working on a revamp for an “M” for my room but didn’t have any dark brown paint. So I’m trying to make do, and it’s not going well. I’ll REVEAL that later. I bet you’re on pins and freaking needles.

The Girl Creative
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crafts

More crap I’ve made.

                                                                                                

 Kay, so this blog really has an identity crisis. It really wants to be a craft blog, but it’s owner is too nuts to just do crafts. Sometimes it really wants to be a blog about the Mormon faith, but it realizes that it’s owner swears too much for that. Plus, her son is too too evil for it. Sometimes it’s a special needs blog, but we aren’t rich enough for people to see how fabulous having a child with special needs is.

(okay. So here comes a vent. I love Kelle Hampton’s blog. I do. I also think that the show Parenthood is okay. My problem with both of these (and this is in no way Kelle’s fault) is that MOST parents of special needs kids aren’t wealthy. They don’t live in big houses and can’t afford fancy cameras (that fancy camera part I threw in because I suck at taking pictures. I’m sure mine wouldn’t be so terrible, my camera isn’t bad at all, if I actually had some photography sense at all).  They don’t go and do fun things all of the time.  Parenthood does a good job telling the story of a child with Asperger’s. But for crying out loud they have their own behaviorist that comes to the home! Do you have any idea how much that costs? Give me a break. Give me a TV show with a child with autism, a batsh crazy mom who spends entirely too much time on other things who also has THREE other siblings. One of which is evil. SO EVIL.. and I’d totally watch it! And not just because stupid Oprah is about to end. I hate Oprah. Why do I watch that show so religiously then? Because I really don’t hate her. I just say I do because I want to fit in.)

So this blog is a mismash of all of the above.

Speaking of Evil Son. On Sunday he refused to take the Sacrament at church. No joke. I turned to Lance in complete exasperation and Lance smiled (the way he does, you know that half smile that shows his dimple and makes you a little bit weak in the knees after all of these years? You know the one…) and whispered, “he’s not worthy.” True. Then yesterday, Mary T. came to pick him up for school. I saw her coming up the road so I ran to get Peyton’s school bucket (yes, they use buckets. ) and I slipped on a transformer car and face planted on the ground. It HURT. There’s this funny thing that happens sometimes when I get hurt. I don’t get sad. I get MAD. I almost cried out of sheer anger. I get to my hands and knees and hear Peyton laughing his head off behind me. Like to the point of tears. I was SO MAD. So I yelled at him that I was really hurt…and he only laughed harder. I couldn’t kill him because I knew that Mary would be at the door any minute and I wouldn’t want her to have to testify against me in court. I like her too much. 

 This stupid wreath took four attempts. Now that it’s done I’m a little mad that it looks all lopsided in the picture. It’s not in real life, right?

These name blocks are my favorite. I got a special request on Etsy last week for some custom name blocks. The guy wanted to make some for his friend that he used to work with. Apparantly he used to steal all of her bananas. I’d hate him for that. So he wanted something with bananas on it and he also told me that he signed some of his letters with this yellow guy. (See the picture) so I made the bananas and the guy out of clay. I liked how this all turned out.  I’d apologize for the mess in these pictures, but I’m not that kind of girl.

I made these a while ago. I like that these are a little bit more three dimensional than the ones I’m used to doing.


crafts

chigiddey check it out.

So these look just like my other wreath and garland- EXCEPT I used my new Silhouette to make cute other types of flowers. And it’s supposed to match my decor. But not really, because I plan on giving it away. Maybe. Anyways, cool, eh?

                                                                                                
crafts

…but it’s still a freaking heart


So I made this the other day. I made it as cute as can be, stood back and took a good look at it and realized “it’s still a freaking heart”

I hate hearts. I hate heart jewelry. I hate people who dot their “i’s” with hearts. I want to break their spirit in the worst way.

So Valentines is coming and I was looking for a way to get out of doing any sort of worthwhile tasks- like cleaning my sorry excuse for a house or paying attention to the kids. So I busted out my Bazzill paper, bought this dumb wreath at Michaels along with all of the berries- which were on sale for 80% off. Hot glued together, added some pearls from my beads and voila, a heart.

Suck!

crafts · holidays

Oh Christmas Tree!



You know, I thought monkeys had it easy living in trees. Until I lived in a tree this week. It sucks. I got all cut up and stuff. But look what I did while I was up there:


Yeah, boy! That’s 3,500 lights! I did not turn into a monkey though. (When I was in my youth, I really thought that if I spent enough time in our pool I would grow fins and become a mermaid. It wasn’t so much the product of an active imagination as it was that people didn’t listen to me when I spoke, so no one corrected my misguided views).

My pictures also suck. It’s because they were taken by my phone. Because the children broke the camera. AGAIN. So now I want a really nice one. Doesn’t make much sense with how the last ones met their demise, but whatever. You’d follow my damn blog if it had nice pictures, huh?