I like to craft. I do. But I’m not an “artist”. You’ve seen my drawings. That’s my best work. I promise. I’m pretty good at copying ideas, though. I’m working on a craft blog that does such a thing. It’s called Mostly Copied Crafts. It’s almost ready. I just need to get a little sick again so I have reason to sit on the computer for several hours. So while you’re so patiently waiting (which you are, right? no? that’s okay. I’m not terribly hurt. I really just need to have something to show for all the time I spend on Pinterest and craft sites) for that blog, check out my latest craft.

But I should back up. Do you remember the story about right before we called 911 after Abby’s hands and feet turned blue (or are you only here for the pictures…of me…because I’m so hot…if you’re into frumpy) . Remember how when I was walking back to the house the cotton was blowing in the air and I felt a crazy amount of peace out of nowhere? So I’ve really wanted a picture of the cotton blowing in the wind. But I haven’t found any that I liked or that I was rich enough for.  I’m cheap. So I made one. Mostly to see if I could. But I like how it turned out. Anyways…

 Made some vinyl with the vinyl cutter.  I can make you some, too. Just let me know. And paypal me $3 with your address. See? We’re good friends.  OR you could just get some big stickers out of your stash of scrapbooking stuff you’ll never ever use. I promise.

I just slapped it on the edge of the canvas. Easy. Peasy?( No. I’ve been around Heather entirely too much lately. I feel an itching need to wear cardigans, I use terms like “easy peasy” and I get excited when I think about serving nachos. I’m a thick rimmed pair of glasses away from this being really weird. )

 After the letters were on I took two shades of blue. I did the darker first and then went over it with the lighter color right after. I took a spray bottle and sprayed it over and over again until it got streaky- and in some places the paint pulled up a little  (it’s hard to show in a picture…but I liked the effect…affect? Someone help me with the usage of that word).

 See? spray spray spray.  Then I painted on just a little more of the light blue mixed with a little water.

And then I laid down and watched the birds fly in and out of my trees while at the same time entertaining Abby by letting her face rake me. And, no lie, I took this picture. OF NATURE.

The painting thing. It’s supposed to look a little surreal or whatever the term is. Then I waited until it was almost dry and peeled up the letters.

Do you need a picture of that? Really? Lame sauce.

Then I took a cotton ball, put a tiny TINY bit of paint on it, blotted it out until it was almost dry and stamped it in the places where I wanted the cotton puffs to be. I thought I was being ironic. But I don’t really know what that word means either. What’s happening to me?  Words are useless. (You know what it is? It’s the damn prozac. It makes me a doormat who can’t remember words and takes pictures of NATURE. But I need it, my family needs it, until we can get to DC and I can get to a REAL psychiatrist who will, almost definitely, institutionalize me. How much of this rant was true? You should start a pool. Is that the word for when you all put in money and whoever is closest wins it? Did you know that the stuff at the cabin that stings your legs is called stinging nettle and not stinging metal? I always thought it was named weirdly. But nettle is also weird I guess.)   


Then I painted some brown on the cotton. Just a little bit. Then I put it in my room where I can see it from my toilet. Because I don’t ever close the door when I pee. Stems from years of things being ruined beyond repair when I did such a crazy thing like that. You know what I’ve noticed though? That when I do go to the bathroom, the first thing I do is rest my elbows on my legs and cradle my head in my hands like I’m losing my freaking mind. EVERY TIME! When did this freaky habit start? 

So now as motivation to look up, I have a picture that I constantly critique. Awesome.