Abby · autism · Casey · confessions · Down syndrome

stupid “perspective”

                                  This will quite possibly be the worst thing I’ve ever EVER written:
I’m mad that there had to be an earthquake when I was already having one of the worst days EVER.  
 So we’ve lived at the doctors these last two days. Yesterday I took Abby in because she wasn’t holding food down. She was right on the edge of being hospitalized again, but I spent the night feeding her very slowly with a syringe. She didn’t throw up anything so I thought we were in the clear. This morning she woke up with 103 degree fever again. So, when the doctor called to check up on last night I mentioned it. Aaaand right back in we go. They did more xrays and found that she has NEW pneumonia in her upper lung area. Before they told us that it was brochiolitus or pneumonia causing her distress- both of which they thought were viral. Today it was very clear that she has pneumonia and that it’s bacterial- most likely from aspirating her vomit. Her upper right lobe (if your a doctor and are reading this and it sounds far fetched, it’s not, I’m probably not describing it right) of her lung has collapsed.  She’s still oxygenating okay, so we were allowed to go home. But not until after they gave her two shots of nasty antibiotics. Poor little girl.
In between all of this fun I got a call from Casey’s teacher. He had spent the first hour at school in the “quiet” room. He freaked out over something, they couldn’t get him to calm down and everyone was at their wits end with him. So he got to come with me to Abby’s doctor. But when they had to do an xray, Heather J. was nice enough to come pick him up. Saved his life or mine. She’s good like that. The saving of the lives and whatnot.
 So, on our way out the nurse said JUST what I knew someone would say to me. “Well, it could be worse, you could be in Japan” My gun was cocked and ready. The bullet was in the chamber.
I said, “Are those my only choices? Pneumonia or Earthquake? Seems like there should be others….” 
Things are always worse for someone else. I’d like to find the one person in the world who can actually say, “no one has it worse than I do.” Today I thought it might be Tiffany. She’s waiting to find out if her daughter has cancer…in Hawaii. Tsunami warning. I just about flipped. 
But it goes back to this: God chastens those he loves. He must love a lot of people a LOT today. There are a lot of people on the other side of this world who are going through something no one should ever have to. It puts things in perspective for me. A little. I still like to complain about how tough today was. Or how tired I am. But I  know that I’m not alone. That prayers are answered. So even though Japan is totally raining on my bad day parade, I know it’s them that I should be praying for.
                               

2 thoughts on “stupid “perspective”

  1. Holy crap! You didn't answer me last night when I asked about puking and junk, so I came to check on here. What a day! Your poor little girl! Poor you! Somehow I feel the need to make this Lance's fault for leaving you alone…. That's what I do to my poor husband, and it's tremendously helpful. When does he come home?So what needs to happen now for you to know you're in the clear? I'm sorry about the terrible timing on the earthquake/tsunami. It really does bite! Let's just not say anything about how tomorrow can only be better, shall we?

  2. I'm glad you said that because really – all of those "trying to be helpful" people have no idea. Perspective is a good thing, though, even when we don't necessarily want it.

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