So I was thinking about him. I think he had a lot to do with the way I turned out. I hope that’s not a total slam to him. My dad died when I was thirteen. Travis was 16- and the oldest brother. There has never been anyone who could get me so angry as well as make me laugh the way he does (okay he no longer makes me angry so much). There were so so many irreverant sacrament meetings. “Yur shakin’ the pew.” I remember watching Beavis and Butthead when we were 14/16 and laughing until we died. We’re going to hell for watching that show, but it’s worth it for the memory. Families are forever in hell, right?
My favorite song of all time is Yellowledbetter by Pearl Jam. Why? Because it reminds me of when Travis used to pick me up from my friends house that was right down the road from the girl he was dating and drive me home. I remember driving down Moon Valley Drive with the windows down and the sunroof back and listening to it very loud. It was a time when it felt as if everything was okay- even if it wasn’t.
When we moved to Washington Travis was bitter and hateful. I think that meant he really liked us. He wrote me a letter- that I still keep close about how proud of me he was- it meant more to me than anything. Being his little sister I always wanted to be like him- or at least- let him like me.
We had a lot of good times. In the house in North Ogden our rooms were right beside eachother. Some nights I’d hear the WOMP of his spud launcher that he’d rigged up to shoot NAILS through his wall into my room. Or when he’d come in with a burnt out lightbulb, pretend like he’s pulling the pin of a grenade with his mouth and chuck it against my wall. Lightbulbs are awesome to break, not so much fun to clean up. It’s a good thing I didn’t.
I miss being close to them. I miss the game nights and going to movies with him and his rockin’ wife. He’s THE BEST to go to movies with. He laughs harder than anyone. He’s crazy.
I’ve been so blessed to be born into the family I have. They’re the good kind of nuts. Mostly.